My friend lost her aunt to lung cancer a few weeks ago, and I wanted to send a card to let her and her family know how sorry I was.
Most people I know can send a card without much trouble, but for me, sending a card is like sending a man to the moon. I’d like to blame it on the fact that I have three kids who take a lot of my time and attention away from such a task, but I have always found sending a card to be extremely challenging, even before I had kids.
Here are the steps I go through whenever I have to send a card:
1. Realize that I am going to have to buy a card because someone is having a birthday, is sick, going through something difficult or has died.
2. Forget to buy it at the store at least 2 or 3 times.
3. Buy the card.
4. Realize we are out of stamps and a trip to the post office is necessary.
5. Forget to go to the post office at least 2 or 3 times.
6. Go to the post office. It is closed.
7. Return to the post office when it is opened.
8. Realize in the case of a relative’s birthday that the kids are going to have to sign the card individually in their own handwriting.
9. Get one kid to sign the card.
10. Get the next kid to sign the card.
11. Get the last kid to sign the card.
12. Realize the address I have is out of date.
13. Forget to send an email for the new address at least 2 or 3 times.
14. Send the email requesting the new address.
15. Receive the new address.
16. Address the card.
17. Place the card on the table in the entryway.
18. Leave the card on the table in the entryway for several days.
19. Carry the card from the table in the entryway to the car.
20. Leave the card in the car for several days.
21. Completely lose the card in the car.
22. Find the card in the car.
23. Come to grips with the fact that the card is now in no condition to be sent.
24. Repeat steps 2, 3, 9-11, and 16-22
25. Put the card in the mailbox.
26. Promise to do better next time.